Breast Cancer Awareness Month

Today I'm humbled by the story of a survivor. Why some may ask, this is not something new. No its not but when you learn that your high schoolmate was diagnosed with cancer at 30 you walk up and pause and say "Thank God she's still here"!

Some ten years ago my Aunt Gwen died from breast cancer. That was one experience that tears me up every time I recall hearing the phone ring after 9 pm and knowing that's the only reason the phone could be ringing.

Many are diagnosed each year and many die because they either don't want to know, decided to see the doctor when it was too late or they just didn't win the battle. My classmate's story and many of the other survivors reminds us that this is not a death sentence! There is no known cure today but there are options.

I use this medium to implore all who read this post to DO YOUR SELF EXAMS! It is so easy to let the cares of this life make us forget to take care of ourselves. Make it a part of your routine, men and women alike, do your breast self exams. Touch, feel, know your breasts. Know them well enough to know when something changes.

If you've never done a breast exam before here is a link to BreastCancer.org's article on The five steps of breast self exams

Join me in observing Breast Cancer Awareness Month this and every October. Donate to the cause if you can. Join the fight...early detection saves lives!!!

Biological Tick-Tock

I've often heard of a certain phenomena where women nearing a certain age hears a certain ticking sound. Interesting enough, the woman in question usually doesn't hear this ticking sound. It is usually heard by the older relatives and friends in the woman's life. This tick-tocking signals to a woman that its time to start ooh and aah over their bundle of joy. As a professional woman I myself thought this was just a silly superstition until the ticking woke me in the middle of the night!

It was a bright and sunny day and I held my child in my arms. My beautiful, warm and unknown gender child. My child was smiling up at me, looking in my eyes with all the trust in the world, believing that mommy would take care of all it's needs and I the willing mommy was eager to take care of my baby's needs. I could beat the asinine car driver who made me wake from this wondrous dream! Yes, it was a dream! I woke up feeling empty, as if I was missing a piece of me. Definitely not what you want to be feeling at three in the morning!

But it did get me to thinking, if dreams are the window to the subconscious am I secretly yearning for children? Was this the evidence of the tick tock? Was it now time to start thinking marriage and family? Was my body telling me something by way of my dreams that I failed to recognize when I am wide awake?

Of all the maddening things that can happen after a dream like that you find out that two people you know are expecting! To make matters worst every tenth woman you pass on the road is either expecting or holding their bundle of joy! Then in the same week the older family members start reminding me I'm getting older or shared stories of their bundle of joy being joyful!

Really!? Can't a woman get a break!? Can't a woman just live her life?

I'm a strong believer in allowing God to determine the when and how of my life. But the universe is somehow  sending me a strong message that I cannot ignore. I'm gonna admit I'm kinda jealous especially when I think that at my current age my child might not be too happy when I have to visit school on PTA days. Probably will not take home the meeting notices and could more than likely ask someone else's young hot mamma to collect their report.


Disclaimer: While I am indeed at the point where the alarm is going off, it goes on snooze often enough for me to ignore it and so I exaggerated the truth just a tad bit.

Do murderers cry?

Nature vs nurture has been debated for years. Pro-nature believes behavior, character is inbred. They believe an individual is born with particular traits thus making them more inclined to a particular set if behavior or actions. Pro-nuture, on the other hand, believes the individual is a product of society. The individual is a product of their experience and influences from persons such as parents, teachers etc.

I was reminded of this debate recently when I wondered do murderers cry? Do they have spouse, children, the cat or dog? Do they fall in love? Cry at the birth of their child?

I just cannot imagine how someone would get up and think to themselves "today I need to kill A, take my child to school, dispose of the evidence, go to the supermarket, get some more bullets, visit my mom, remember to send money for my child's school trip to the teacher, oh yes and before I forget I need to help with that science assignment".

It is hard to accept that someone could be so callous and yet care for people in their lives. Which leads me to think, if their love one is hurt do they forgive or get even?

Howdy and Tenky

My mother used to tell me growing up "Howdy and Tenky nuh bruk nuh square", of course as a child I never really understood what that meant. As I grew up it started to make more and more sense. Unfortunately, as I grew, generally as a population our manners seem to get poorer and poorer.

I witnessed one incident where a man knocked over some items on a market vendor's stall and then turn 'round and tell her "pick up dat fi mi". No "sorry" no nothing, he preceded to walk off right after his version of "sorry"! I can only assume his intention was to say sorry. Not only do we find the young males of our times are ill-mannered we find the same for the younger females.

Well, at least that has been my general view on the matter until tonight. Here I am in a taxi, first to enter and a woman, early or mid-forties, enter in the back sit and sat right behind me. Not only did not even paid me the courtesy of a good night she spent a good 3 minutes arguing with herself that the taxi would not be ready for now and she needs to get home urgently. So she got out and headed to another taxi. I decided it would be a good opportunity for a social experiment so I waited to see what would happen when the next person entered.

Half minute later a elderly woman entered, again sitting right behind me. To my dismay she too did say a word! I continue to wait after all I have no where to go. Next entered a man, mid thirties. Thankfully the treasured words escaped his lips. And the elderly woman behind me did what? She loudly responded good night. In came a teenage girl who like her elderly counterpart had a seat without a mumbling word.

This is not sufficient evidence to suggest that mid thirty year old men are more mannerly. I wouldn't go so far. However, it did provide sufficient grounds for me to think we do need a Values and Attitude Program in Jamaica. Not one that has at its core a political agenda, but one that brings our people back to the things that make us Jamaican. All over the world we are seen as a warm and friendly set of people. When you enter a resort you see all sorts of Jamaicans saying "morning", "evening", "afternoon" and "how you do". Yet it is not important enough to show this same courtesy to our own neighbours here at home.

I really don't know if there is a fix but something must be done. I take the bus and see elderly persons who are forced to stand because children who couldn't be more than 10 takes the seats intended for the elderly. What hurts more is a child and a parent in these seats and the parent wouldn't even let their child sit in their lap so that the elderly person can get a seat. The famous words being in these situations that they paid for the child hence they paid for the seat. I wonder if some of these parents recognize the fact that their children are storing these experiences for when they grow older. If Karma is the force she is portrayed to be woe be unto those said parents. Expect to be treated as "unwanted" and "unloved" when you become the elderly person on the bus!

Yes, we need a Values and Attitude Program in some shape or form or us adults will be sorry when we get older to see the generation we will create to lead us as a people.


Tek care, walk good!

The Affair

It all began this morning while I was closing the door and your scent lingered in my nostrils. I knew without a doubt tonight was going to be the night that we reacquainted ourselves with each other. It's been an entire year since I've had the taste and smell of you. I put you to the back of my mind and went to work, I knew I couldn't do much if my every thought was focused on you. Little did I know on my way home someone would remind me of you!

The man standing behind me had a familiar odour emanating from his bag. I knew it was exactly your scent, after all we have been together long enough that I know your scent. This reminded me why I really wanted to get home so badly.

I got home. I needed to put my purchases away before indulging in the pleasure I knew was awaiting me in a few minutes. Its been a long time so I wanted to prolong the wait, I rearranged my room, clean the house, open packages, all while you chilled no doubt knowing what was going to be the outcome of this evening's activities.

It appeared my senses knew what it wanted even while my brain refused to acknowledge you. After an hour of being busy my senses had enough! I walked over to the fridge and extricated you from your resting place. I inhaled, chilled or not you smell the same, you have that unmistakable odour. Yes, we were both ready for this!

You felt so comfortable and familiar in my palm, yet I knew you were brand new. I positioned myself on the settee, all the while thinking I must find the right place 'cause I don't want a drop to go to waste. I was in position, I took another whiff of you. Unlike some I don't need papers, towels or plate 'cause I know every drop is going one place - my tummy. My mind is screaming for the sheer bliss that comes with the real taste of you. And then I bit in! My taste buds exploded, my mind went wild! I've waited for way too long for this euphoria! I devoured you, all the while savoring the taste that only you my faithful Julie Mango can have. I've had others and believe me I love only one other, but you my Julie holds a special place that no other can take. My only other love also has its special place. Tomorrow I will ensure that place gets rewarded for its patience but now My Julie, it's just the two of us.

I exhaled with pleasure, knowing unless one of my friends gave me another this might be just one of two times this mango season that I will experience this pleasure. I promised to plant a tree in the desert-like landscape of my backyard but I knew the evidence of my satiated need could not produce a seed.

Sadly, all good things must come to an end and indeed My Julie you did. But I know without a doubt there must be another opportunity this mango season for me to savour you. This cannot be our last encounter for this another mango season.

Contractor General Woes

Our local cartoonist never fails to put a smile on my face! I wonder how this situation will play out...waiting to see...

Inna The Bus...

(This photo is the property of The Gleaner)

Firstly, I must declare that I have nothing against Rasta or Rastafarianism. I strongly believe that each person must have the sacred right to practice their religious beliefs within reason. But I had the most unfortunate experience today! Once again on mi jolly bus (coaster) making my way to work. Firstly the bus was pack and the conductor thought he could squeeze in a few more people cause as someone in the back said "nuh other bus nuh deh pon di road". So here I am on a middle seat to boot and a dread hold a seat beside mi! Just smoke a spliff so he smelled quite medicated and his locks was caught in one with the ends all blowing in the wind. Yes, blowing in the wind. Now, everything thus far was not too bad but when we hit the highway the driver clipping at 100 kph then mi start see "knotty". This Dread hair was all up in mi face! The man dread was blowing in the wind! And me trying to be diplomatic decided I wasn't going to say a word just lean a little on the woman to mi right. Thankfully this helped, but the young girl behind me was dying with laughter when she saw my discomfort!

But seriously, is it too much to ask that we groom ourselves properly? Come on man! I could have easily avoided being assaulted by dreadlocks if the dread tied his locks nicely and saw to it that his mid back length hairdo was well kept. It was torture to be blowing this man hair out mi face, thankfully I never needed to talk or I might have had a good serving of locks for breakfast! Ah well, it certainly taught me a good lesson, stay far from the window when a dread seating in yuh row!

Big up the Rasta man who confident bout himself and him hairdo!

Tek it easy..walk good!